


be bold

by watergator



Series: distract yourself with fics, it’s gonna be okay [5]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alcohol, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Shaving
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:42:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23634043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watergator/pseuds/watergator
Summary: dan is fed up of his hair after a few weeks of quarantine
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Series: distract yourself with fics, it’s gonna be okay [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1663378
Comments: 10
Kudos: 114





	be bold

“You know,” Phil’s voice floats up beside him where he’s lounging on the balcony. “You’d look alright with one of those man-buns.”   
  
Dan cracks an eye open before bringing his hand over his forehead to shield himself from the blinding light that’s beaming down on him. Phil however steps directly between Dan and the sun, blocking it out momentarily as it halos around his head like some dorky looking angel.   
  
He’s grinning as he hands Dan his glass, condensated where his fingers are wrapped around it and ice clinks against the rim.   
  
“You’re just saying that to stop me,” Dan speaks. His voice has gone all low from where it’s gone unused for a while.   
  
Phil lets out a breath.    
  
“No,” he lies. “I just like the long shaggy look.”   
  
He plops into the chair beside him, setting his own lemonade on the table between them.   
  
“Get your nips out,” Dan mutters. Phil stops to look at him then, he lets out a laugh.   
  
It’s hot enough to lay under the sun without a shirt. Dan’s doing it. He quite likes getting to oggle Phil’s bare chest whenever he gets the chance, especially when it’s under a bright sun and blue sky.   
  
Phil’s already tugging at the bottom of his when he asks,   
  
“If I do, will it stop you from shaving your head?”   
  
Dan pretends to think for a moment. He already knows the answer.   
  
“Nope,” he grins, bringing the glass to his lips and drinking the sweetness down.   
  
Phil smiles and scoffs, taking his shirt off regardless.   
  
Dan always gets what he wants.   
  
*   
  
It’s gone dark out. They’d spent the evening trying to make pasta from scratch; now that deliveries and takeouts were sparse as well as few and far between, they’d needed to learn how to cook properly. They’d already spent previous evenings watching various youtube tutorials or with Kath on the other end of a zoom call calling out suggestions as well as scolding Phil for eating the ingredients.   
  
The make the pasta and even though it comes out not quite right, it still makes for a nice dinner. Phil even managed to grab some nice red wine for them to share.   
  
They’re washing dishes together, letting their Alexa play out the little tunes - today is Dan’s turn to pick the soundtrack. There’s a lot of Frank Ocean that he knows neither will complain about.   
  
Phil’s hip bumps against Dan’s and Dan bumps it back.   
  
He’s scrubbing away at the wine glass when he says,   
  
“I’m gonna do it tonight.”   
  
Phil almost drops the rag he’s holding into the full sink of bubbly water before his fingers flext around it, gripping it tightly,

“What?” He says, shoulders sag and he looks the picture of hurt.   
  
Dan can’t help but let out a bark of laughter. He passes Phil the glass and picks up the next one.   
  
“What?” He shrugs. “Might as well, nothings stopping me.”   
  
Phil sighs, making no real effort to actually clean the dishes. “I never got to have one last moment with it.”   
  
He sounds so genuinely sad and when Dan turns his head to look at him, he’s actually pouting.   
  
“Babe,” Dan says softly. “It’ll grow back.”   
  
Phil sighs, setting down his useless rag and glass and reaches up to tug on a curl; it’s hanging over his brow now, in dire need of a proper cut.   
  
“It’s so pretty though,” he argues.   
  
Dan sucks in a breath. “It’s just hair,” he tells him, reaching up to gently move his hands away. 

“You’ll still love me won’t you?” he asks, “even if I look like an egg?”   
  
Phil chews on the inside of his cheek and his brows furrow. Dan remembers when he himself went something similar when he finally chopped off the emo fringe.    
  
He’d spent countless nights staying up to convince him that it was  _ Phil  _ he loved, and it was  _ Phil _ he found attractive - not his hair.   
  
“It’ll be fun,” Dan tells him with a grin. “I might even let you shave something into my head until it all has to go.”   
  
That’s apparently all it takes to convince Phil it’s a good idea.   
  
Dan doesn’t think he really had to convince him of anything. He’d be shaving his head, Phil’s blessing or not.

Phil giggles and reaches up to run his hands through the tangles. He can’t lie that he won't miss this, but hair will grow back, and he’s sure he’ll find new ways to touch and show affection.   
  
“I can’t wait to see you look like an egg,” Phil laughs, clearly seeing the funny side of this now. Dan laughs too. He’s hoping he has a somewhat normal shaped skull underneath his curls.   
  
Either way, it’s not like anyone is going to see him.   
  
*   
  
They’re on the bathroom floor.    
  
It’s dark outside and time had already trickled into the early hours of the morning.   
  
After washing dishes Phil had complained that one thing he’d miss is having to grip and tug on a handful of those curls. Dan had smirked, rolled his eyes and dragged Phil to the couch where he’d pushed him down as he sunk to his knees and got to work as Phil pulled and tugged one last time.   
  
Like some kind of goodbye for now.   
  
They showered, Phil massaging shampoo into his hair one last time, taking their time as they let their hands roam and touch, lips on skin that tasted like strawberries and warm.

“If I do a bad job, you can’t be mad at me,” Phil says. He’s sat behind Dan, electric razor in his hands. It’s already plugged into the socket and Dan can feel his heart beat crazy fast in his chest.   
  
“It doesn’t matter if it’s bad,” Dan says with a frantic laugh. “Just fucking do it, mate!”   
  
He’s feeling crazy and he’s feeling scared and he’s feeling overwhelmed. He feels anxious when Phil flips the switch and suddenly the room is filled with the sound of a low humming buzz.   
  
He hears Phil take a deep breath. “Ready?”   
  
Dan sucks in a breath. He reaches up and touches his hair. It’s still a little damp from the shower and it feels extra curly somehow. Maybe because it’s hanging onto some kind of small hope.   
  
He takes his hand down and exhales.   
  
“Ready.”   
  
Phil slowly but surely brings the razor closer to his head. The noise gets louder the more it nears towards his ear and it feels like in a split second, the world stops. Phil presses it against the back of his head, running it upwards, and then, there’s silence.   
  
“Oh my god,” Phil says quietly, but before Dan can begin to panic, Phil’s howling with laughter, the kind that makes his whole body tip back and his face to scrunch up.   
  
Dan reaches behind him blindly as his fingers reach out to find the damage.   
  
Sure enough, he’s quick to find the strip of hair that’s been shaved from his head.   
  
It’s not nearly as short as he wants it, not yet at least, but there’s definitely a change in the way it feels there.   
  
He’s grinning so hard his face begins to hurt.   
  
“Can I keep going?” Phil asks once he’s composed himself. “It’s so satisfying.”   
  
Dan laughs. Of course it is. Of course he’d find the joy in something so insane.   
  
“Well, I don’t want a weird strip on the back of my head, so, yeah,” Dan laughs, “keep going, bub.”   
  
Phil doesn’t hold back this time. He’s running the razor up and down his head. Big and little chunks fall from his head. It takes a while to get it even. They have an argument on which razor setting is best, until Phil insists he’s the hairdresser, and Dan just sits quietly and lets him mess around with it.   
  
He attempts to draw a dick and a giant P into his head, but when he shows Dan with a picture from his phone, it looks like a big squiggly mess.   
  
It’s the thought that counts he supposes, and eventually he makes Phil shave it off.   
  
They end up surrounded in hair. It gets down his shirt, down Phil’s shirt, in the sink, on the floor, on the bathmat, over the toilet and even in the bath somehow.   
  
But they aren’t worried about the mess just yet because as soon as the razor is shut off, Dan can hear his own heartbeat in his ears.   
  
“Stand up, have a look!”   
  
Phil is so enthusiastic about the whole thing, he’s already stumbling on dead legs, holding a hand out to Dan still sat cross legged on the floor.   
  
Dan looks at his hand and then back at Phil who’s grinning from ear to ear. When he takes his hand and stands up, he’ll be looking at himself in the mirror. He’ll see himself in a completely different way for the first time ever. He’ll still be himself, just a little different.   
  
He takes Phil’s gross, sweaty and slightly hairy hand and pulls himself up. He’s already being spun around by the shoulders where he’s met with his own reflection in the mirror.   
  
He certainly looks… strange. It’s not bad though. It’s not awful, and Dan just stares at himself in awe until he lets out a cackle.   
  
Phil joins in too, the pair of them just stood, doubled over in laughter over what they’d just done.   
  
“I look… I look like a fucking egg!” Dan exclaims. He reaches a tentative hand up to graze his hand over the fuzz of what is left of his hair. It’s not quite down to the scalp, but with this new look, he now can see the actual shape of his head.   
  
“It’s so good!” Phil squeals excitedly. Dan smiles at him through the mirror.    
  
“I’m not hideously ugly to you now?” He asks, haf teasing.   
  
Phil looks at him - the real him and reaches up to touch his weird half-bald head. “Never,” he whispers. “I love my egg man.”   
  
Dan just grins before leaning in to kiss him quick on the lips. “Thank you.”   
  
Phil hums, and smiles. His eyes keep drifting upwards to where the new haircut is proudly presented.   
  
“Now,” Phil says, clapping his hands together. “Shall we clean this up? Make a wig out of your shedding? Oh! That’s such a fun video idea…”   
  
He’s already trailing off as he goes to search for the broom, happily talking to himself about making false mustaches and giant eyebrows when Dan looks back at the mirror. He touches his head again and smiles.   
  
*   
  
The bathroom is cleaned, they had to have another shower because of the tiny little hairs they kept finding everywhere, and now they’re tucked up in bed together.   
  
Phil’s already half asleep, his big head is nestled against Dan’s chest, undoubtedly hearing the sound of his heart beating against his chest.   
  
“Does it feel weird?” Phil mumbles, his lips brush up against his bare skin and it feels nice.   
  
Dan turns his head on the pillow. “Yeah,” he whispers. “Like it should be there but it’s not. My head just feels naked.”   
  
Phil chuckles and he can feel the vibrations run through him like hot electricity. 

“At least it’ll be easier to take care of,” Phil says. He crooks his neck so he can look at him properly, and when he does, his face almost cracks in half with a smile.

“No more fancy curly hair shampoo,” he mumbles as his hand once again reaches up to touch and to stroke. Dan was worried that he’d miss the feeling of Phil running his fingers through his hair, but honesty, the feeling of his hand going against the grain, massaging his almost bare scalp, feels just as good.

“It feels so freeing,” Dan mumbles sleepily. 

Phil hums a short laugh. “Because your head is so… naked now?”

Dan’s eyes slip shut but he’s still holding onto the feeling of Phil’s hand on his head. 

“Nuh uh,” he grunts. “It’s freeing because. Well, it just feels like I’m in control, y’know?”

When Phil says nothing he opens his eyes again. He’s giving him an almost dreamy look, as if he’s completely and utterly infatuated with this new haircut.

After a while, Phil seems to register the conversation they’re still having, his hand slips away from his head and instead lands in the middle of his chest. 

“Control?” He asks.

“Yeah,” Dan hums. “It’s like, right now I feel like sometimes I’m not in control. Being stuck inside, not being able to do anything anymore. It’s scary, right?”

Phil nods. “Right.”

“So shaving my head, it’s something I controlled. It’s an action I carried out, with no real harmful consequences. Sure I could have hated it or you could have done a shit job but like I said earlier—“

“Hair grows back,” Phil cuts in before he can. Dan smiles at him.

“Yeah,” he croaks. “It does. Eventually it’ll be okay, right?”

Phil rubs his hand against Dan’s chest before nuzzling his face there, taking in a deep breath like he’s breathing him all in.

“It will be,” he says between a yawn. “Your hair will grow back and so will we.”

Dan wraps an arm around his back and holds him close. “That’s deep,” he laughs.

“Your mum is deep,” is Phil’s response, except it’s sleepy and low and he’s clearly suffering his sleep for the banter, bless him.

But Dan lets him slip into a steady stream of subconsciousness as he kisses the top of his head. 

His own head does feel weird and naked and scary, but in a weird way it feels good. It feels refreshing and new.

He closes his eyes with Phil’s head still cushioned against his ribs, holding him close.

Things will regrow, and they’ll be okay.

Just like his little egg head, things will be okay.    


**Author's Note:**

> come say hi on tumblr !! @watergator


End file.
